The fear of decision-making
I've always had problems with making decisions.
Be it big ones, like should I quit my job because it's sucking the life right out of me, or small ones, like where should our next camper trip go to?
I think, in part, it might have to do with being neurodivergent and multipassionate. All my life, I've been told to choose one thing and stick with it. That's what society wants you to do. That's what your family wants you to do.
Researchers estimate that by age 10, kids with ADHD will have been exposed to 20,000 negative messages from parents, teachers, and society.
No wonder we have such an ingrained negative self-belief and difficulty making decisions.
Fear is, of course, the culprit. We fear we'll choose the wrong path, leading us to waste time or end up in the wrong place so we don't decide. And this keeps us stuck.
So, how can we help our decision-making?
Find out your core values. These values will act as a compass when facing tough decisions.
One of my core values is freedom. I don't like to be tied down. So, when I came up with the idea of converting a camper, this was a no-brainer. Because camper = more freedom.
When I wanted to start a product-based business, I knew it wasn't a good idea because I like to travel a lot. Selling products on the go would work, but that felt too much of a hassle.
So, whenever I want to start selling products, I remind myself of my core value of freedom. This way, I don't jump to an idea that won't work for me.
How do you figure out your core values?
Take out your journal and ask yourself these questions:
What is important for you? Have lots of friends? Traveling?
Think back on past experiences; what were your life's best and most painful moments?
What lights you up? What would you want to try but have never tried?
What are your non-negotiables? What will you never compromise on, regardless of anything or anyone?
Everyone's core values are different. We're all on a different path. Decision-making is hard, and figuring out your core values might take some time. That's okay. But I hope this will bring you something.